If you’re single and happy about it, congratulations. This article is not for you. Feel free to read some of our Okay Human articles, or go outside and visit your niece.
So you’re in your 20s and boyfriend-less. Big deal.
For some, it actually is a big deal. With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, many bitterly single women are shunning social media as newsfeeds are dominated by sweet nothings and disgustingly optimistic posts about how being in love is amazing, how their boyfriends are the best boyfriends ever, how chai tea is best drank with the person you love, and all that jazz.
And it isn’t just petty drama; being loveless genuinely saddens many women. To many, being single – especially on Valentine’s Day – reminds them of painful break-ups, insecurities about their appearances, and other forms of anxieties and heartaches associated with being alone and feeling unloved.
And God knows being single isn’t nearly as fun as how this movie portrays it to be:
There’s no partying every other night. No one-night stands every weekend. No hangovers and reckless adventures that fill the empty void reserved for a boyfriend. It’s mostly just tubs after tubs of ice cream and endless binge-watching of Friends on Netflix.
Let’s face it. Being single, especially in your 20s, an age when you’ve really just learned about the magical world of love, isn’t exactly the ideal scenario. Being single in your 20s can suck.
But ONLY if you make being single suck.
Selena Gomez is single. Emma Watson is single. Jennifer Lawrence is single. Look at the company you got. Powerful women with the world on their palms. And they aren’t the “single by choice” crowd either. At one point in their past they have been hurt and rejected by guys, but they’ve move on with their lives and became better than ever before. Being single has obviously worked out for them, and there’s no reason it shouldn’t work out for you.
Let me repeat that. Selena Gomez is single. Emma Watson is single. Jennifer Lawrence is single. YOU are single. It doesn’t sound so bad now, does it?
And don’t give me the “they’re millionaires and they’re in Hollywood and they’re attractive” BS. They actually have it worse. Single + Hot Celeb is the worst combination in Hollywood.
Imagine always being hounded by paparazzi, asking you endless questions about your love life – or lack thereof – and why it’s your fault you’re single. Imagine going to the internet to look for some good quinoa recipes, and then out of the blue you see on Twitter a webloid article about you, and why you’re single, and the possible reasons why you don’t have a boyfriend (she nags too often, she parties a lot, she’s very dull, she’s bad in bed, she’s too good in bed, her quinoa recipe sucks).
And you can no longer be just friends with co-stars. You get linked to each and every celebrity male that you come in contact to. Oh, you bumped into Zayn in a restaurant? WHY ARE YOU RUINING HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH GIGI? Oh, you had coffee with Jimmy Kimmel’s Live’s Guillermo on his birthday? SHAME ON YOU! HE’S A FAMILY MAN!
This is not to trivialize your own experiences with being single. We all have our unique fingerprint into the depressing world of singlehood. But there’s really nothing you can do about your situation except (1) put all your efforts – screw school, work, and social life – into finding your soul mate, or (2) distract yourself and focus on things that will actively improve yourself.
I bet no one here is willing to do number 1. Let’s try number 2. Here are some suggestions.
1. Learn a new language. French things up a notch. Guys find that sexy.
2. Volunteer for your presidential bet, or actively support a local charity. Hillary needs young supporters more than ever, now that her popularity among millennial voters have dwindled. Prefer Bernie instead? /r/SandersForPresident has some suggestions on how you can help. We have no idea how you can help The Donald. You can watch him order some of his steak, I guess (UPDATE: the steaks are no longer in the market).
Hate politics as much as you hate being single? I bet you like puppies. Petfinder.com provides you with a list of shelters near your area.
3. Photography. You can take amazing photos even without a fancy DSLR. A growing number of professional photographers are turning to their smartphones for shots.
The point is, finding romance is 80 percent coincidental. It won’t arrive galloping on a majestic steed. Prince Charming is not looking for girls while clutching on a glass shoe. Prince C is in your French class. He’s busting his butt for Sanders. He’s taking close-up photos of flowers with his iPhone. Time will bring you together, but there are things you can do to make that sooner than later.